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CommentsBig Toys for Big Boys
Want to spend a day rock-crawling? Bring sandwiches, water and spare parts
By Matt Lemmon
Photo Dylan Whitaker
It's a lesson all guys should learn: Don't forget your rubber.
The 900-acre-plus ranch is owned by Brandon Powell, 28, and features trail levels of one (easy) through five (hardcore). Every other weekend, Brandon opens the ranch to the public. For $5 per person and $10 per Jeep (kids 12 and under are free) you get a day of off-roading; Brandon is adding showers to make campers more comfortable.
The ranch is in a remote corner of Webster County, but Dave says the ruralness was part of the charm, with its caves, bears, mountain lions, copperheads, scorpions—pretty much every kind of Missouri wildlife you can imagine. Brandon says he has even found abandoned homesteads from pre-electricity days deep in the woods while clearing trails.
But on this weekend, most of the people at SMORR were hard-core hobbyists trying to earn a sticker (decals that go in their Jeeps’ rear windows, sort of a status symbol not unlike mountain climbers’ patches). It was a sizeable group, and surprisingly diverse, with thrill-seekers ranging from 40something buddies and boyfriend-girlfriend duos to a family of four from Kansas. All participants at SMORR bring their own vehicles (some versions of ATVs are accepted, as well). Jeeps are not provided at the ranch.
The danger factor with four-wheeling—or rock-crawling, a more apt description—is always present, but no vehicles rolled the afternoon Dylan, Dave and Tim were there. Though it’s not uncommon for a Jeep to overturn, the relatively low speeds associated with rock crawling—as well as modifications like roll cages and harnesses, staples on most vehicles—keep riders safe as long as they keep their hands inside.
“Almost every vehicle out there was not what you would consider ‘street-legal’,” says Dave. Of the dozen or so vehicles running the ranch on this particular weekend, Dylan says, only one actually doubled as transportation.
For good reason. “Chances are there will be some damage to your car,” Dylan said. The good news: Even a major problem likely won’t put you out of commission: If a vehicle breaks—even a serious mishap like a snapped axle—everyone pitches in to fix it, right there on the trail. Brandon and his friends will call acquaintances to bring spare parts in a pinch—even on Sundays. Indeed, working on the Jeeps is half the fun. “This sport is really ‘leave-no-man-behind,’” says Brandon. “If someone breaks or has trouble, we make sure they’re taken care of.”
Dylan and Dave said a vehicle broke on every trail they tackled, which made for a lot of down time, best filled by rehydrating and snacking. “The toughest part of the trail would take four seconds, and then we’d wait an hour while everyone else made it up,” Dylan says. But in spite of the hurry up and wait, the thrills are considerable. “When we came to that waterfall [a five foot vertical ledge], I was like ‘Oh sh**.’ I didn’t have a seatbelt. I had an oh-sh** handle.” But Dylan says Brandon, his driver, was unfazed: Even though Brandon had use of only one arm (the other was in a cast), he still managed to handle the ledge—while smoking a cigarette.
It’s really a lot less dramatic—but much cooler—than it sounds. Dave’s driver (Brad) had a Jeep with 47-inch tires with only four of five pounds of pressure in them, so when he came to an obstacle, the tire conformed to the shape of the rock and literally flowed over it. The tires, Dave says, cost about $5,000 for a set, though many other costs can be alleviated through a tight bond with local salvage yard owners.
UGO
Southern Missouri Off Road RanchNext public weekend: September 15–16
417-827-3952, smorr.comTake U.S. 60 east to Seymour. Turn south at the main Seymour exit, take Highway K five miles.
Fall 4x4 Fest
If you don’t have time or money to get into four-wheeling yourself, you can still catch ton of horsepower October 12–14 at the Southern Missouri Off Road Ranch during its Fall 4x4 Fest, a charity event benefiting the Children’s Miracle Network. There will be live music, Jeep competitions, open trials and vendors.The festival cost is $55 per vehicle, for as many people as you can buckle in. Water and electricity are available, though the campsite is not outfitted for RVs at this time, says owner Brandon Powell. For more information go to smorr.com, or call Brandon at 417-827-3952.
